Radhika Apte acknowledges after giving birth to her daughter that neither she nor her husband "wanted kids, but there was this one per cent curiosity…."

"Then, when this happened, we wondered whether to even go ahead," Radhika Apte continued....

Recently, Radhika Apte, who is renowned for her moving performances, opened out about her genuine experience becoming a mother. She recently described the bizarre moment she discovered she was pregnant in an interview.

She said to Vogue India, "I don't want to make it public, but let's just say it's funny how it happened—it wasn't an accident, but we weren't trying." "It's such a stupid story," she continued. Still, it was unexpected.

The actress said that she and her husband had not originally planned to become parents. Knowing whether or not a person wants children makes things easier, in my opinion.Although none of us wanted children, there was a 1% interest in what it might be like. When this occurred, we weren't sure if we should proceed at all," she admitted.

These candid observations draw attention to a prevalent but little-discussed aspect of new motherhood: conflicting feelings that go against society's expectations of maternal assurance and happiness.

The psychology of being a new mother

According to counseling psychologist Priyamvada Tendulkar, having a child causes a significant change in one's identity and is frequently accompanied by ambivalence. Tendulkar says it's important to accept a new mother's range of feelings, including excitement, guilt, fear, and frustration, without passing judgment. A mother is human first and foremost—flawed, emotional, and absolutely imperfect—in contrast to the conventional narrative of the "perfect, self-sacrificing mother."
 

An existential identity crisis is common among new mothers, who struggle with the overwhelming responsibility of raising another person while lamenting the independence of their former lives. Tendulkar emphasizes that women can discover a greater purpose in their new job without giving in to guilt or self-criticism if they accept these emotions as normal.

Managing parenthood: Emotional and practical techniques

Tendulkar offered a few tactics that one could use to overcome these obstacles:

Analyzing Past Influences: A mother's parenting style may be unintentionally influenced by her relationship with her mother. By thinking back on these influences, new moms can develop a parenting approach that suits their own values.
Parenting is unpredictable, so it's important to accept this fact. Resilience and anxiety reduction can result from accepting this reality.
Fighting Perfectionism: The notion of the "perfect mom" can be harmful. 

Mothers should instead aim to be "good enough," cultivating a practical and long-lasting outlook.
Reframing Self-Criticism: Mothers who have a loving support system might reframe feelings of inadequacy as normal reactions to a difficult role.
Reasonable Self-Talk: Mothers can develop self-compassion by encouraging affirmations such as "I'm learning every day" or "It's okay to ask for help."
Radhika's candor on her doubts emphasizes how crucial it is to normalize these discussions. Motherhood is a messy, beautiful, and changing process of self-discovery, as she so beautifully explains.